Love.

For a long time I have wanted to write about a rather sensitive topic. A topic that people have made a taboo. I want to write about love and about being in love.

Please don't read along if:
- You don't like the word "love" (the following text contains the word 22 times)
- You find personal opinions, experiences and emotionally driven writings cheesy and unnecessary.

What is love, and who am I to define it? Well, I think most people are aware of the fact of love. Knowing what it is all about. Knowing that it is all about acceptance, confidence, self consciousness, caring, mutual respect, recognition, togetherness.

I find it quite difficult to figure out the right way of seeking for love. To end the search for it. I know that by far most people contains a mutual love and respect in between the self and the family. But aren't all of us dreaming about the perfect relationship with one other person as well? Just the two of us.

From the outside it seems like the people who have already found love, are the ones who have everything. Their lives seem faultless, seem like they aren't missing a thing. Sometimes I even have to pull myself out of pure jealousy and bitterness, just when looking at other people who seem happy with their other person. And sometimes, I just can't stop smiling when seeing two people looking like they are in a bubble where the world is only for the two of them. That's when the lack of love first of all hit me as a warm feeling, a happy feeling. And afterwards it turns out to make me fairly unhappy or just a little bit sad that I'm not the girl who has got everything.

Mh, I think it is important to realize that love is not always a bed of roses. Personally, I haven't really experienced the long-lasting-truly-love-ever-after-thing, but by listening to my girlfriends around me I sense that a happy and healthy relationship is not constantly happy. It seems like there has to be arguments and small fights, has to be jealousy, disagreements and a few times of yelling and tears. It seems like this is something that brings the two of them closer. Makes them open up for each other, make them talk. Make them realize who their love is and why they are together. As long as the arguing isn't about unfaithfulness, lack of trust or respect then the unhappy days in a relationship are not necessarily a sign of an upcoming break-up.

Although I haven't experienced love in a long-lasting relationship, I have experienced the feeling of being in love. The amazing, but at the same time, extremely annoying feeling of having to look at your phone all the time and having to really concentrate when talking to someone to make sure the thoughts are not running off with you. The happy feeling inside of you when your "crush" sends you a text message, that says "hi." HE TEXTED FIRST! That's the important thing, not the content of the message. That's what I will tell myself and smile, while thinking about how to answer, which smiley to put and how not to seem too excited about him writing me. The feeling of desperate confusion when seeing pictures of him with another girl. Just seeking for a sentence beneath the photo saying "My good friend" or "My sister" or "My cousin."

Just the happy energy your body contains the following days after have been spending time with him or her.

When writing this I can't stop smiling. I think about how ridiculous it is to be excited about this one other person. The excitement of seeing him, or her, randomly while walking through the crowded streets. Not necessarily stop up and say hi, but just the joy of seeing that one person.

All of this just because you are in love or you are searching for love.

Please, if someone can, then tell me how to find love. Why is it that when walking down the street, seeing someone who smiles at us,
we just smile and pass by? Why can't we just stop up and forget the risk or the follows that might be embarrassing.

"Forget the risk, and take the fall -
If it’s meant to be, then it’s worth it all."

I absolutely love this quote. And still, I'm not a person myself who would always follow its meaning.

For the ones of you who are married, who has found the right love for sure, who has been in a constant relationship for years. For you I could imagine this post about love and the search for it sounds rather pathetic or just plain immature. You will probably tell me that I have plenty of time to find Mr. Right, and that I shouldn't be worrying about this topic this much. But I must admit that it crosses my mind quite frequently in the same way as I am sure it has been crossing your mind at some point in life. Where is my Mr. Right? I wonder. I wonder where to find him, where to search for him, if I should search for him, if I should give up the search and just wait. If I am too picky or if I am not looking good enough. If I could do something different or if he just haven't shown up yet.

He will. I am sure there is one for every single one of us who are wishing for love. One person to share togetherness, happiness, unhappiness, happy days, ice-creams, bad jokes, laughs and tears with. One person not only to tell "I love you" but a person where you will be able to look at the relationship and say "I love us."